i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I just had sex on a roof
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
