I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
