my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
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