it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
