we're blogging at a bar
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I just blew my weed a kiss
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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