His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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