Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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