I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
