apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
