my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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