Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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