Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Rumble strips road head = magical
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
