Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
