tell your sister to shave her snatch
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
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we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
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this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.