White coat. Heels.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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