My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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