I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
