If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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