I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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