ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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