So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
