You're so nebulous sometimes
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
