After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
