ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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