I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I lost the right to judge tonight
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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