We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
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