Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
