I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize