i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
