Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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