there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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