do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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