let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize