Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
