Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize
