We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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