Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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