in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Randomize