I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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