p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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