ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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