Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Randomize
