on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
two words: eviction party
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
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