i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me