Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
