All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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