i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
