lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
We left the knife in your bed.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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