i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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