dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
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