We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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